Pity Party of One

Have you ever worked so hard for something and then come to the end to realize that it's not over? All through school, no one informed me that this was how it was going to end. Or continue, as it turns out.

It's always been, just finish kindergarten! Learn to tie your shoes and first grade shall be yours! Finish fifth grade, middle school is fun! (not if you're me and decide to cut off all your hair, then you're just mistaken for an unfortunate boy) Just finish eighth grade, high school is waiting! Now, monkey, graduate from high school! You'll love college. I did, don't get me wrong. But I'm only twenty-two, so what the hell do I know? I feel like I've been working towards this my whole life, and now that I'm "done", I don't know what to do with myself. Get a job, yes. But what do real people do in the evenings? It can't just be all about Netflix.

All through college, I've been told to "work hard and a job will come easily". As if a bachelors degree is some of kind of Golden Ticket to Willy Wonka's Job Factory. Turns out, IT'S NOT.

Now, I know I'm being jaded because I only graduated two weeks ago, but two weeks ago is NOT when I started looking.

And by looking I mean searching. Like searching in an uncharted jungle that everyone else seem to have mapped out but me.  When did I miss the class where our substitute teacher was Indiana Jones? And why did I no one give me the notes?

I have sent hundreds of emails introducing myself, inquiring about jobs, hell, applying for said jobs. My last quarter of college was spent in one of three ways: searching/applying for jobs, doing an endless amount of homework, or wishing I was asleep. One of those paid off and it wasn't my job search.


What did I prove my last quarter of college?

That I can work my ass off without dying of exhaustion. I got a 4.0 last quarter and I graduated Magna Cum Laude (my overall GPA was 3.8 to all the perspective employers reading this; please note that I am saying that with my glitziest game show host smile). Take that high school teacher who thought that art school was a bad decision!

What did I learn my last quarter of college?

A lot of stuff I can't say for a year (darn NDA!), that energy drinks CAN sustain life for a week at a time, and that people don't respond to emails. I can count on both hands the amount of emails I have received. And so far, none have been promising.

*Correction: One possibility may be in the works. Fingers crossed?! 



So, I continue this search (one that seems endless) for something that had already been offered to me as a prize for all my hard work.

Well, I did it. I finished. Where is my glittery, pixie dust covered job? Wait, that's not right. That sounds more like a job as a stripper. Put this degree to good use, huh, Mom? (Just kidding, Mom, I promise I'm not a stripper, I'm too uncoordinated. You know I'd fall of the stage at least three times a night. Not good for tips ...or maybe? No... No.) This is the part that no one likes to talk about when you're applying. To us, they (admissions, usually) say that this is how it will go in the "real" world, "Oh? You have a degree? Here. Here is your job." INCORRECT.

It can't just be me, right? Facebook makes it feel that way. Facebook has a way of making you feel inadequate, when, in fact, you are perfectly fine! (or so I hope) Stupid Facebook, but alas, that is for another post.

So, I continue my search and continue this blog about said search. And I hope my use of all this free time (WHAT IS THIS SORCERY?) entertains you. Unless it's just me reading, then I'll probably come on in a few hours and laugh at my own jokes. Oh, me.

On to tomorrow, and a hundred more emails sent.

LAST THOUGHT: If I still tie my shoes bunny ears style, do I have to start over? I'm sure I would appreciate nap-time a lot more this time around.